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Pick of the week

Pick of the Week

14th January 2015

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Here’s my grab-bag pick of the best illustration inspiring celebrity gossip, scandals, arts, entertainment, & just plain quirky stories & picture sexiness. A round-up for busy pervs. There’s pictures—reading optional.

Disclaimer: Any comments I make are purely satirical, totally without foundation, and “Man is condemned to be free; because once thrown into the world, he is responsible for everything he does.”—Jean-Paul Sartre.

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Pick of the best stories & pics

See also:

Recent/related stories:

Miley Cyrus gave Moschino party pokeage (Pick of the Week, 19th December 2014)
Miley Cyrus gave amfAR Inspiration Gala strapped boobage (Pick of the Week, 31st October 2014)
Vanessa Hudgens, out and about in Los Angeles

For sure, she’s certainly not been overdoing the Cadbury’s Creme Eggs, non-Dairy Milk or not!

Recent/related stories:

Sarah Hyland & Vanessa Hudgens gave photobooth birthday tongue (Pick of the Week, 19th December 2014)
Stella & Vanessa Hudgens gave sistersister tongue (Pick of the Week, 26th November)

Lena Dunham #FreedTheBoobies if not her nipples (celebrityoopsdigest
.blogspot.co.uk).

Lena Dunham, Instagram

Recent/related stories:

Lena Dunham is a big Xtina fan; tells her so (Pick of the Week, 30th April 2013)

See also:

Recent/related stories:

Recent/related stories:

Dakota Johnson was topless in Pantelleria (Pick of the Week, 26th November 2014)
Beyoncé teased with first Fifty Shades of Grey trailer (Pick of the Week 23rd July 2014)
Dakota Johnson Fifty Shades of Grey set candids in Vancouver (Pick of the Week, 5th February 2014)

Recent/related stories:

Claudia Romani gave bikini thumper in Miami (Pick of the Week, 19th December 2014)

Updated 28th March 2015.

Link updated.

Recent/related stories:

Recent/related stories:

Recent/related stories:

Heidi Klum got her baps out in Mexico (Pick of the Week, 21st April 2014)
Oops! Heidi Klum slipped a nip in the Bahamas (Pick of the Week, 2nd April 2014)
Heidi Klum burnt her bum, want’s you to see (Pick of the Week, 15th July 2013)

Recent/related stories:

Kimberley Garner’s derrière gave St. Tropez a workout (Pick of the Week, 22nd August 2014)
Oops! Kimberley Garner flashed her ass in London (Pick of the Week, 26th February 2014)

Recent/related stories:

Bai Ling slipped a Movie meets Media tittie (Pick of the Week, 19th December 2014)
Bai Ling gave The Crow 20th Anniversary underboob (Pick of the Week, 26th November 2014)
Bai Ling was… Bai Ling at at Comikaze (Pick of the Week, 13th November 2014)

Chelsea Handler gave a cold tittie tweet (celebrityoopsdigest
.blogspot.co.uk).

Chelsea Handler, Twitter

Recent/related stories:

Chelsea Handler gave ass for Instagram ass (Pick of the Week, 19th December 2014)
Chelsea Handler gave a stereophonic tittie tweet (Pick of the Week, 26th November 2014)
Chelsea Handler tittie and bare bum baited Instagram (Pick of the Week, 13th November 2014)

Madame Tussauds in Berlin unveiled new waxwork figures of Miley Cyrus and Jennifer Lawrence (uk.eonline.com).

“Are they lifelike or totally creepy?”
Miley Cyrus waxwork, Madame Tussauds in Berlin

I guess that totally depends on whether you are visualising it on display in the waxwork museum or in your living room.

“And for some inexplicable reason, Miley’s figure is set right in the middle of some traditional Christmas decorations, including a Christmas tree, stockings over the fireplace, a reindeer, presents and more.”

Judging by Miley’s Instagram it is seemingly more inexplicable that she is not riding said reindeer.

Thanks to NessaLvr—whom I’m sure has waxwork in his living room —for passing that on.

See also:

Recent/related stories:

Taylor Swift got a new waxwork at Madame Tussauds Hollywood (Pick of the Week, 31st October 2014)
Lady Gaga got a waxwork at Musée Grévin in Paris (Pick of the Week, 10th July 2013)
Farrah Abraham reveals botched lip injection

“THE US reality TV star appears to be keen to warn others not to make the same mistake, and underneath one snap, Farrah wrote: ‘Girlfriends don’t say I didn’t warn ya ! #BOTCHED California #ER #fixit.”

Crikey! That… looks exactly like how James Deen’s “small dinkle” (Pick of the Week 3rd Jun. 2013) left her back door in that tape.

Updated 21st January 2015.

“Farrah Abraham, star of ‘Teen Mom 2,’ is doing well after fixing a botched lip implant plastic surgery that resulted in her recent hospitalization. Abraham showed off her natural lips Jan. 18 at a nightclub in Long Island, New York, where she posed for photos.”

That is good to hear. I’m willing to bet Vivid got some soon-to-be-released Backdoor Duck Lips tape action first though!

Recent/related stories:

Tongue teasers

Rita Ora and Selena Gomez got to grips with Cara Delevingne (celebritytonguedigest
.blogspot.co.uk).

Rita Ora and Cara Delevingne, Weinstein Company & Netflix Golden Globes After Party in Beverly Hills

See also:

Recent/related stories:

Cara Delevingne, British Fashion Awards Model of the Year (Pick of the Week, 19th December 2014)

Chrissy Teigen gave Times Square pokeage (celebritytonguedigest
.blogspot.co.uk).

Chrissy Teigen, New Year’s Eve with Carson Daly

Recent/related stories:

Chrissy Teigen flashed major bra-less sideboob (Pick of the Week, 22nd August 2014)

LeAnn Rimes gave #GLABBERchallenge pokeage (celebritytonguedigest
.blogspot.co.uk).

LeAnn Rimes, Instagram

Recent/related stories:

LeAnn Rimes gave Ventura crack-shot (Pick of the Week 21st April 2014)

Nicki Minaj gave Rolling Stone pokeage (celebritytonguedigest
.blogspot.co.uk).

Nicki Minaj, Rolling Stone

Recent/related stories:

Ariana Grande, Jessie J, Nicki Minaj American Music Awards (Pick of the Week 26th November 2014)
Nicki Minaj’s mega rack got its Scottish on (Pick of the Week 13th November 2014)
Nicki Minaj gave Club 79 underboob (Pick of the Week, 21st October 2014)

And topless Jamaica tittie too (sawfirst.com).

Caroline Flack, Jamaica

Arts, culture, tech. & funnies

It’s No pants subway ride 2015 (usatoday.com).

“No Pants Subway Ride began in 2002 in New York as a public prank and has since been celebrated by commuters around the world.”

No pants subway ride 2015

Recent/related stories:

Ron Jeremy

“Born in Queens, New York, Ron Jeremy, aged 61, left his job as a teacher to pursue a career in acting. After his girlfriend submitted a photo to ‘Playgirl’, he modelled for the magazine and moved into porn films. Jeremy is listed in the ‘Guinness Book of World Records’ for Most Appearances in Adult Films, starring in over 2,000 films.”

Alas, his prodigious dietry habits nearly caught up with him back in early 2013 when he suffered a heart aneurysm. Dr. Mo Mowlam (history.co.uk), “a hot firebrand of a woman” and “friend”. Not many politicians could count on both prolific porn stars and republican and and loyalist paramilitaries with whom she brokered peace for sincere personal praise, for sure

Okay, trivia, because it invariably… comes up. Indeed, The Hedgehog was noted for skills including autofellatio in the 1970s.

Recent/related stories:

Ron Jeremy on Google Glass:, “I’m coming over.” (Pick of the Week,30th July 2013)

.:: Top column 2 ::.
Chocolate Dreaming
For sure, it’s not even Easter but there’s panic, doubt and outrage over Cadbury’s non-Dairy Milk Creme Egg’s continued surrealistic ability to provide Nessa with a facial! (telegraph.co.uk).
Free the Nipple documentary film

“…the film focuses on the hypocritical contradictions in our media-dominated society wherein acts of baroque violence, killing, brutalization and death are infinitely more tolerated by the FCC and the MPAA, who regulate all films and TV shows in the US.”

For sure, hear, hear to that, and the more #FreedNipples the better, but:

“Is it simply a matter of societal taboos, which is to say, a matter of social conditioning? Or are there perhaps intrinsic biological factors, some deep DNA override to why we are so programmed to stare at a woman’s nipples?”

Or just Instragram’s “societal taboos”, as proved by comedienne Chelsea Handler, which the equally accessible Twitter does not have, and is it irony to complain if there is when it is your choice giving all the opportunity to stare—even when there is no breastfeeding or lump feeling going on.

Some sociology reading, and perhaps even some economics may be the order of the day there, or perhaps just a word with some for whom #FreeTheNipple, or indeed the display of said female nipple since early times has proved to give some mileage, and that resentment of that may really be the nipple bearing bud of the problem for many. Could it be perhaps that there is just not the same call or demand for display of the male vareity? #SecondarySexCharacteristics (Wikipedia).

Lina Esco

As the #FreeTheNipple (freethenipple.com) arthouse documentary film has been recently released, there is also some murmuring that the whole thing was nothing but a giant PR stunt to promote said nipple freeing documentary. Indeed, Entertainment Tonight (etonline.com) interviewed Lina Esco, the actress behind the campaign movement and she sheepishly confessed that the movie/documentary idea pokied first and then the movement.

“‘If I would have made a movie called Equality and no one was going topless, nobody would be talking about this!’ said Esco.”

Info: Lina Esco (Wikipedia).

First reviews in? Oh dear, not so promising. Free the Nipple (Entertainment Weekly). Too much “Revolution 101 rhetoric” and not enough nipple for “bizarrely shamed and oversexualized in American culture” perhaps.

For sure, #FreeTheNipple dominated 2014’s internet campaign trail with many celebs getting involved to promote chest bearing equality. Catch up with that in Best of Picks of the Week 2014.

Scout Willis goes topless to protest Instagram

Your Vote: Took as read that you are quite happy to have #FreedNipples—you are here at a site with plenty on display after all—what do you feel is the actual motives for most backing the campaign? (Pick of the Week 8th July 2014).

Recent/related stories:

Chelsea Handler tittie and bare bum baited Instagram (Pick of the Week, 13th November 2014)

And most regrettably, lastly…

Charlie Hebdo, Meilleurs vœux, au fait
Meilleurs vœux, au fait.
(Best wishes, by the way.)

“At least 12 people are dead after shots were fired at the headquarters of the magazine, with multiple attackers escaping. Two police officers are believed to be among the dead, with 10 journalists killed. One of the dead is said to be editor Stephane Charbonnier, known as Charb, was the magazine’s top cartoonist and was placed on the ‘Al Qaeda kill list’, published last year in its magazine Inspire. […] Three other cartoonists from the magazine are also said to be dead. One of them is Jean Cabut, known as Cabu who drew the cover of the Charlie Hebdo magazine that riffed on the Danish Mohammed cartoons, as well as Verlhac Bernard, better known by the pseudonym Tignous, and Georges Wolinski, whose work had also appeared in Libération and Paris Match.”

Charlie Hebdo: A profile of the French satirical magazine (independent.co.uk).

“Charlie Hebdo is a left-leaning French weekly satirical magazine known for its provocative tone and anti-religious stance, and features cartoons, reports, polemics and jokes. The cartoon-led secular magazine mocks religious faiths of all kinds, defends women’s rights, and satirises public figures, from politicians to judges, bankers, and religious founders.”

Charlie Hebdo
Le pape va trop loin!
(The Pope goes too far!)
For sure, but he didn’t order anyone shot.
“French newspaper Libération published the Charlie Hebdo cover online late Monday night, ahead of the satirical magazine’s sale on Wednesday. The cartoon shows a bearded man in a white turban, ostensibly the Prophet, with a tear streaming down his cheek, and holding a sign reading ‘Je suis Charlie’. Overhead is the phrase: ‘Tout est Pardonne’—‘All is Forgiven’.”
Tout est Pardonne
Tout est Pardonne
(All is Forgiven)

For sure, why shouldn’t he cry for what is being done in his name.

(Updated 3rd Feb.) You can read Charlie Hebdo issue 1178 the “survivors issue” online here (issuu.com).

After accusations of appeasing Muslim fanatics by the artist behind one of those infamous cartoons of Mohammed (dailymail.co.uk) the BBC has also scrapped its ban on depicting Prophet Mohammed as being “out of date” (telegraph.co.uk).

“The corporation has now clarified its stance, insisting that the guidelines were already considered out of date and are in the process of being revised. Copies of the original guidance including a blanket ban on depictions of Mohammed have been removed from the BBC’s website.”

So, why does Islam forbid images of its prophet, and was it always so? (Jul. 2011).

“Islam’s prohibition of pictures of Mohammed stems from its opposition to idolatrous images. This extends to all figurative art … yet art in some Islamic cultures, notably Persian, has depicted human beings, Mohammed included. Pictures of Mohammed figure in manuscripts from Persia [Shia Islam] under Mongol rule in the 13th and 14th centuries. Examples survive in libraries in London, Edinburgh and Paris.”

So you see, under strict interpretations of Sunni Islam it’s not just Mohammed, even the figurative snowman is no-go: Saudi cleric condemns snowmen as anti-Islamic (msn.com).

“Quoting from Muslim scholars, Sheikh Munajjid argued that to build a snowman was to create an image of a human being, an action considered sinful under the kingdom’s strict interpretation of Sunni Islam.”

And lest we forget:

I am not Charlie, I am Ahmed the dead cop. Charlie ridiculed my faith and culture and I died defending his right to do so. #JesuisAhmed” (dailymail.co.uk).

“‘Papa est parti pas Wolinski,’ read the post, which translates to ‘Papa has left (is gone), not Wolinski.’ The words from Elsa Wolinski were accompanied by an image of what is thought to be Georges Wolinski’s study, his drawing board on his desk with a pencil on a white page. Wolinski, 80, was well-known for his tongue-in-cheek spoofs on romance and sexuality, though never refrained from making cynical observations on politics and society.”

More powerful
© AP Photo/MacLeod Cartoons
“Defiant, angry, poignant, irreverent and sobering, their drawings united cartoonists in grief, tried to make sense of the nonsensical, and sent a shared message: We must not, will not and should not be silenced. Some drawings touched such a nerve they made one want to both laugh and cry. … One of the most powerful drawings had no drawing. Christian Adams’ cartoon for The Daily Telegraph in London showed a completely blank space with the heading: ‘Extremist approved cartoon.’”
A gift from Tibbs…

Updated 27th April 2015.

Writers protest at Charlie Hebdo Freedom Award (news.sky.com).

“Six novelists have pulled out of a New York literary event in protest at French satirical magazine Charlie Hebdo getting a freedom of expression award. [Peter Carey], a two-times Booker Prize winner, said the award stepped beyond the group’s traditional role of protecting freedom of expression from government oppression. ‘A hideous crime was committed, but was it a freedom-of-speech issue for PEN America to be self-righteous about?’ the New York Times quoted him as saying in an email interview.”

I guess it’s a “self-righteous” semantics “freedom-of-speech” issue then.

Updated 23rd March 2015.

Charlie Hebdo staff split over money two months after attack (telegraph.co.uk).

“ Until the attacks, Charlie Hebdo was teetering on the verge of bankruptcy and was selling only around 30,000 copies a week. But a ‘survivors’ issue’ published a week after the attacks flew off the shelves and ended up selling seven million copies.”

Which I’m sure will have many howling of Zionist conspiracies to increase sales.

Updated 23rd January 2015.

Charlie Hebdo, “100 lashes of the whip if you don’t die laughing”
“To be fair, some of the vendors, most of whom are based in Europe, are tacking on a charitable cause to their moneymaking schemes (even if they’re still planning on pocketing most of what they make).”

Updated 16th January 2015.

You can read Charlie Hebdo issue 1178 the “survivors issue” online here (issuu.com).

Link updated 3rd February 2015.

Updated 15th January 2015.

Charlie Hebdo founder says slain editor “dragged” team to their deaths by “overdoing” provocative cartoons (telegraph.co.uk).

“One of the founding members of Charlie Hebdo has accused its slain editor, Stéphane Charbonnier, or Charb, of ‘dragging the team’ to their deaths by releasing increasingly provocative cartoons, as five million copies of the ‘survivors’ edition’ went on sale. Henri Roussel, 80, who contributed to the first issue of the satirical weekly in 1970, wrote to the murdered editor, saying: ‘I really hold it against you’ [calling] Charb an ‘amazing lad’, [but] also a stubborn ‘block head’.”

The “R” issue with C.B. was discussed in the much longer Message Board entry for this story. It was mentioned how it had always gone after all walks of religious, judicial, political and social intolerance with often “distasteful” relish. The facts remains that, being a non-conformist satirical weekly, it will, like all tabloids, go after whatever is the more prevalent for it is what they do and ISIS/ISIL, al-Qaeda et al. have given them plenty of opportunity by succeeding in smearing the image of Islam in the public eye for many.

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Tags: Bai Ling, Cara Delevingne, Caroline Flack, Chrissy Teigen, Claudia Romani, Dakota Johnson, Farrah Abraham, Heidi Klum, Jennifer Lawrence, Jessica Alba, Kimberley Garner, Laura Govan, LeAnn Rimes, Lena Dunham, Lina Esco, Lorde, Maitland Ward, Miley Cyrus, Nicki Minaj, Rita Ora, Selena Gomez.

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Disclaimer:

Illustrations, paintings, and cartoons featuring caricatured celebrities are intended purely as parody and fantasised depictions often relating to a particular news story, and often parodying said story and the media and pop cultural representation of said celebrity as much as anything else. Who am I really satirising? Read more.

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