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Pick of the week

Pick of the Week

12th March 2014

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Here’s my grab-bag pick of the best illustration inspiring celebrity gossip, scandals, arts, entertainment, & just plain quirky stories & picture sexiness. A round-up for busy pervs. There’s pictures—reading optional.

Disclaimer: Any comments I make are purely satirical, totally without foundation, and I heard it involved a horse’s dinkle.

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Pick of the best stories & pics

Miley Cyrus and The Hand of Adonis sex toy

Miley Cyrus was scratching her snatch with The Hand of Adonis (idly.craveonline.com).

“Apparently it’s a sex toy called ‘The Hand of Adonis’.”

What did she have in the other hole, Sappho’s toe?

Your Vote: Have Miley Cyrus’ twerking antics been a hit with you? (Poll, Pick of the Week, 2nd October 2013)

Miley Cyrus twerking her ass at the Allstate Arena in Rosemont

Here’s Miley’s ass performing at the Allstate Arena in Rosemont (sawfirst.com).

Recent/related stories:

Miley Cyrus snogged Katy Perry during her LA concert (Pick of the Week, 26th February)
Miley Cyrus kicked off her Bangerz tour in Vancouver (Pick of the Week, 19th February)
Selena Gomez, Borderfest at State Farm Arena in Hidalgo, Texas

Popstrel princess Selena Gomez performed at Borderfest (sawfirst.com)…

Selena Gomez poking tongue at Borderfest at State Farm Arena in Hidalgo, Texas

Giving some cheeky tongue! (celebritytonguedigest
.blogspot.co.uk)

Recent/related stories:

Lily Allen

After Twitter backlash Lily Allen claimed her feminist comments as guest editor of men’s magazine Shortlist were misquoted and misinterpreted (gigwise.com).

“Lily Allen has responded to criticism surrounding her interview as guest editor of men’s magazine Shortlist, insisting: ‘Those were not my words.’”

Lily had seemingly claimed feminism “shouldn’t even be a thing anymore” and claimed men are not the enemy but women are as “it’s more of a competitive thing.”

Golly, it’s no surprise that could be misinterpreted, perhaps proving her point by twerked lil’ Miss Cyrus’ nose in it a few months back (Pick of the Week 22nd Nov. 2013) before hastily backtracking for a chance to climb on her bottom Bangerz bandwagon.

Her statement in the interview—assuming it was hers and not big boob obsessed horse racing pundit John McCririck‘s (dailymail.co.uk)—commanding that “men should be men. Go out, earn some money, come back and look after my children.” (mirror.co.uk) may have set the hands that she claims no longer need move on the equality clock back too. Would that be while she’s chained in the kitchen cooking and washing up?

Lily Allen, Shortlist magazine

Here’s Lily in Shortlist magazines March issue (hawtcelebs.com).

Recent/related stories:

Ashley Tisdale, poolside bikini candids in Santa Barbara

Ashley Tisdale gave poolside bikini in Santa Barbara (hawtcelebs.com).

Recent/related stories:

Ashley Tisdale gave some boob for Maxim (Pick of the Week, 15th April 2013)
Amy Childs giving big boob downblouse heading off to her Brentwood boutique

Reality TV star and former TOWIE teaser Amy Childs gave big bosom downblouse heading off to her Brentwood boutique (celebrityoopsdigest
.blogspot.co.uk).

Leaving former England fast bowler Darren Gough who split with his wife this week after claims of an affair with Amy (dailymail.co.uk) with a sticky wicket?

Info: Amy Childs (wikipedia.org).

Recent/related stories:

TOWIE’s Amy Childs wants to open her own Vajazzling academy! (Pick of the Week, 26th November 2012)
Courtney Stodden cartwheeling in a bikini in L.A.

Courtney Stodden flipped and twirled her tatas (egotastic.com).

Recent/related stories:

Courtney Stodden struggled to contain her bowling beach balls (Pick of the Week, 17th December 2013)

.:: Top column 2 ::.
Cara Delevingne: I fucked Michelle up the bum
Confirming she is over Rita Ora, Cara Delevingne lists achievements for the Sunday Times 100 Makers List Of The 21st Century list.
Nicki Minaj Instagrammed in the shower

Nicki Minaj Instagrammed in the shower (celebrityoopsdigest
.blogspot.co.uk).

Recent/related stories:

Nicki Minaj busted out the nipple pasties again (Pick of the Week, 12th February)
Nicki Minaj Instagrammed these! (Pick of the Week, 24th October 2013)
Cara Delevingne

The Sunday Times 100 Makers List Of The 21st Century lists model minx Cara Delevingne as one of the most influential people in the country (style.uk.msn.com).

“Cara is a great celebrity. She’s entertaining, talented. She went out with Harry Styles; she does a good line in selfies. But beyond her own field, in which she is obviously huge, her influence to me appears to be limited.”
Cara Delevingne, backstage at Fendi fashion show in Milan

Oh! There is nothing limited about that tongue and what it’s making if you ask me! (celebritytonguedigest
.blogspot.co.uk).

Recent/related stories:

Michelle Rodriguez and Cara Delevingne and are indeed dating (Latina Pick of the Week, 20th February)
Cara Delevingne gave blue tongue for Love (Pick of the Week, 5th February)

Arts, culture, tech. & funnies

Massachusetts bans the taking of upskirt photos

Massachusetts banned the taking of upskirt photos (dailymail.co.uk).

“Distributing such photos would carry a maximum punishment of 10 years in prison and a $10,000 fine. [Senate President Therese Murray] said those who take such photos sometimes post them on pornographic websites.”

Recent/related stories:

¡Ay! Eiza González flashed her panties with an upskirt (Latina Pick of the Week, 18th December 2013)
I Love Feminist Porn

Good For Her releases 2014 Feminist Porn Awards Nominations (avn.com).

“The nominated films for the 2014 Feminist Porn Awards feature the highest quality and diversity of feminist porn for another amazing year.”

Just as guys like what they like, gals do too—and their wide-ranging porn tastes may suprise you.

Recent/related stories:

Carolee Schneemann, Eye Body, 1963

Carolee Schneemann, the avant-garde artist who bared her buttocks for Yoko Ono, says “I never thought I was shocking” as her first solo UK show opens (theguardian.com).

“The artist, now 73, has spent her life smashing taboos and shocking audiences. She was at the forefront of movements that only later came to be known as body art, performance art and feminist art, paving the way for the likes of Marina Abramović, Cindy Sherman, Tracey Emin—and even Lady Gaga.”

Recent/related stories:

Lady Gaga wants to be the next Andy Warhol (Pick of the Week, 27th August 2013)
Paul Gauguin, Tahitian Woman with Evil Spirit, c1900

Gauguin: Metamorphoses exhibition at New York’s MoMA rethinks Paul Gauguin’s work focusing on his dark, bizarre drawings (theguardian.com).

“Gauguin: Metamorphoses, which opens on Friday at MoMA in New York, recasts the artist as an altogether darker figure, closer to Edvard Munch and the dark pre-Freudians of Northern Europe than the post-impressionist confraternity of Van Gogh, Seurat and Cézanne.”

Recent/related stories:

Tim Berners-Lee

Sir Tim Berners-Lee on the Web at 25: the past, present and future (wired.co.uk).

“In 1989 I delivered a proposal to CERN for the system that went on to become the world wide web. This year, we celebrate the web’s 25th birthday.”
In what way has the internet changed your habits the most?
More porn—who the hell buys mags or DVDs if they have the net? Now I have fetishes I never new I ever had! 41%
It has introduced me to people all over the world and keeps us in touch—and hey, some have shown me their rude bits! 23%
I read and look things up more online than in books, papers or magazines and can quote Immanuel Kant without knowing who the hell he was. 15%
Give me the online games. Minecraft, WoW etc. I haven’t taken the lid off a table-top game in at least a decade! 13%
Films, TV, radio, music… I have a collection that used to take up a dozen shelves and cupboards in my top pocket. 6%
I used to have to go out to shop. Not any more. 2%

This poll has now been archived.

Recent/related stories:

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Tags: Amy Childs, Ashley Tisdale, Cara Delevingne, Courtney Stodden, Lady Gaga, Lily Allen, Miley Cyrus, Nicki Minaj, Selena Gomez.

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Disclaimer:

Illustrations, paintings, and cartoons featuring caricatured celebrities are intended purely as parody and fantasised depictions often relating to a particular news story, and often parodying said story and the media and pop cultural representation of said celebrity as much as anything else. Who am I really satirising? Read more.

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